A shit day out

What a shit day I had

By Mini Me Hulk

Well Sunday has been and gone. And yes I did not get in the club, not even mentioned by the media as being the main man behind the event.... THE BASTARDS. I WILL HAVE MY DAY YOU... MARK MY WORDS. OHHH I COULD CRUSH A GRAPE.

As the people who did the real work stood outside to watch the unveiling and rub shoulders with the hoy paloy, I had to stand by the public barrier and watch from afar with a tramp that I had picked up off the street near London Bridge to make out I had mates. (It cost me a bag of Dip daps and tube of smarties)

The events main theme was un-veiled and people started to clap and cheer. However because of my stunted growth large outrageous face and special needs learning curve and years of dip dap abuse, it took a wee bit for the signal from my receptors and white ventricles in the left side of my brain to secrete the proper amount of cervical fluid and signals strength to my arms and hands, so I could only manage slow claps. I thought about trying to form words as well but knew that was going a brain function to far.

I was so angry that I was so insignificant that the press did not want to talk to me, even when I tried to get them to see my event in the pub, ok..... so I can’t get a Wiki entry like Bungle, wee jimmy Cranky or even Florence from Magic Roundabout... BITCH she got me arrested once for stalking her, only for Mick the Marmilizer one of the Diddy men. Who, I may add kicked seven shades of poo out of me because he found me lurking around her garden at night.

He was doing her after a Ken Dodd corporate event for the Inland Revenue and she never told me. I heard them laughing about me because he got me took off the 1975 Diddy men annual and banned from the Jam butty mines, I was so angry when I heard her say pelican neck, I fell off the plant pot I was tip toeing on and nearly broke my legs as it was a long way down.

Out came Marmilizer with just a star spangled thong and 70s silver Garry Glitter clogs on, you know the ones, the ones with massive thick soles.

He then processed to do a Michal flattery out of river Dance impression on my head. I screamed FUCK OFF NO NOT THE FACE, IVE GOT A CASTING INTERVUEW FOR THE BORROWRS TOMORROW. But he was relentless; all I could see was Marmilizers goofy grinning teeth and a flurry of silver clogs and could hear Florence in the background shouting GE ON MY SON, GIVE IT HIM IT RITE HARD (she was from Sunderland originally)

When I woke up I knew I had to do something to get famous so Florence would want me,,,,if only I could get a Wiki entry, and here I am trying to cash in on other peoples heard work and yes you guessed it, I failed big time AGAIN I’m still looking for the bus to stardom and notoriety to jump on, problem is I just have no real talent other than harassing and stalking...Oh and being a self publicising Twat (I think that is what SKY NEWS said I was the other day)

Ho hum there is always the Keith Moon event to try and grandstand and spoil, Oh.. Maybe not, looks like they are on to me already. THE BASTARDS, BACK TO THE DREWING BOARD. And who put me on Gay dating site. Aarrrrr that Marmilizer,,, I will get you,, mark my words.

Peter Cook Plaque

On a serious note. I would like to take the time to congratulate Miss Sally Weston for her sterling work over the past year and a half and bringing about the hugely successful Peter Cook Plaque day on Sunday the 15 February 2009 she is not one to blow her own trumpet so I thought I would do it for her
Without Sally westons tireless commitment to this historic event, it would not have taken place and been such a successes. Thanks should also go to all the members of the Heritage foundation and Westminster council.

Among the stars at the event on Sunday was comedian Barry Cryer Broadcaster and quiz show host Nicholas Parsons and many more. The Heritage Foundation's David Graham said the plaque was the inspiration, tenacity and hard work of Sally Weston, she is the real workforce behind the project.

Sally said to a press man

Also the nice thing is that the wording after 'only twin' was supplied by myself... as the previous submission had been grammatically incorrect and was worded in such a way to suggest peter cook literally ran through the club at high speed.. lol in fact the rate it was going I wouldn't have been surprised if it had been dedicated to Peter Cock

See links
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/7891000.stm

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/celebritynews/4630850/Peter-Cook-honoured-with-plaque.html

Well done Sally, Job done!